HELLBEAST:
Poor Hellbeast. Her life was going pretty well: she had a place to sleep, rent-free, bowls of food and water that magically refilled themselves, and two humans who would pet her or leave her alone, depending on her desires.
Then IT came.
IT was a miniature human with a huge head. IT lacked the ability to give Hellbeast treats or play with her. So she ignored IT. But sometimes, IT was really loud, and for some reason the humans gave all their attention to IT instead of her. Hellbeast occasionally approached IT with a quizzical look, but the humans would shoo her away.
One day, IT began to sit up. The humans seemed excited by this, though Hellbeast didn't think it was all that special. Then, ITS ravenous gaze fell upon her. IT bared ITS teeth, and from ITS mouth issued a horrible squealing noise, high-pitched and full of...glee.
After that, ITS eyes followed her everywhere she went. IT watched her all the time. Sure, it was unsettling, but at least IT was immobile.
Until one day IT wasn't.
Suddenly Hellbeast found herself in a constant race to stay ahead of ITS grasping, yanking hands. She became very familiar with the underside of the human's bed. Worse, IT began to interfere with her stuff. IT played with her toys, threw her food out of the magic bowl, and splashed her water everywhere. IT even tried to dig into her litter box. Hellbeast was living in a nightmare.
And that is where things stand today.
KHAN:
Hey kitty I like you I live you kitty you're cool let me pull your tail just once okay kitty hey let me chew on your ears come on kitty be a sport I love you and you won't feel a thing I promise just for a second kitty come on one second I love you kitty come here to me KITTY KITTY KITTY where are you going kitty? Why are you running away?
We're working on 'be gentle with animals', but until then I'm afraid Hellbeast will remain a creature of the night, venturing out only when IT sleeps.
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