We are fully aware that someday, Khan is going to ask where he came from. The Scientist and I plan to prepare a detailed explanation, with charts and graphs and diagrams. We just need help deciding which explanation to prepare for him.
1. Mommy and Daddy decided they wanted a baby. They placed some chew toys and some snacks in the backyard. Then they used a stick to prop a box up over the treats, and tied a string to the stick. After a while you crawled under the box and we trapped you.
2. Mommy and Daddy were in a restaurant when the waiter brought over a baby. Neither if us had ordered a baby; the kitchen must have made a mistake. The waiter said we could have the baby; he wouldn't charge us for it and if we didn't take it they would have to throw it out. We figured, hey- free baby! and brought you home.
3. Mommy and Daddy had the house sprayed for all kinds of pests. But one day Mommy accidentally left some sweet potatoes on the kitchen counter. The spray kept all the other babies out, but you must have had a really strong constitution (and love for sweet potatoes) because you got in and set up shop in the kitchen. You ate all the sweet potatoes. We finally set up some glue traps, and when we caught you, you were just too cute to release into the wild.
So readers- which should we choose?
Definitely either 2 or 3. Probably 2, because you don't want to tell him that he was an unwanted pest. But you definitely don't want to give him the "Mommy and Daddy wanted a baby, not specifically me" complex either.
ReplyDeleteNot that I had it, but a friend of mine was a really really big surprise (most people don't expect babies after they've been neutered), and she one day explained to me that her parents kept her. My parents, on the other hand, were so desperate for a child that they wouldn't have cared. I really wish my mom hadn't agreed...